‘There are interesting things we have to think about as parents that heterosexual couples don’t.’

Massapequa

“Our wedding was amazing, but as we planned it, we would meet photographers and DJs who’d ask, ‘Is that legal in New York? You do that there?’ We had conflict with family who were opposed to our lifestyle and didn’t immediately tell us. We had people attending our wedding who asked, ‘Can I bring so-and-so because he’s never been to a gay wedding?’ It was a spectacle for some. We said, ‘It’s just like a straight wedding, but it’s two women getting married.’

“Starting a family was an interesting journey. We did a lot of research and read that it can be a long, difficult process for people that can’t physically create a baby. We were extremely fortunate that my wife was able to get pregnant on our first try. The donor that I chose reflected me as much as possible. It was a really cool process because it was almost like shopping online!

“There are interesting things we have to think about as parents that heterosexual couples don’t. When we were getting our older daughter ready to enter school, we felt we had to prepare her for what might come. We talked to her about how there are different kinds of family structures and how not everyone has a mommy and a daddy. She was 3. We wanted her to feel empowered.

I would rather someone ask me respectfully what it was like to start a family. If we just stop to listen and learn, we might be mindful and in a better place.

“A big worry for us was that kids were not going to be kind to her. We didn’t think so much about the adults in her life. She came home and said, ‘My teacher said I have a daddy; everyone has a daddy.’ We saw that we had to prepare and educate the educators of our children.

“There are different struggles and worries for us as parents. I had to adopt our children. I had to be fingerprinted and have home visits. It’s really demeaning. We have to think about traveling to states that don’t recognize our marriage. I once heard a speaker say, ‘Being a part of the LGBT community, you will fight for the rest of your life. It’s not so much that you will fight big battles, but you will always have something you have to fight for or stand up for.’

“Some people feel it isn’t their job to educate others, but we disagree. I would rather someone ask me respectfully what it was like to start a family. If we just stop to listen and learn, we might be mindful and in a better place.”

‘I hope my art will make inroads in inspiring others into action, toward a better world for newer generations to come.’

Jamesport

“During infancy, my parents — having noticed my not responding to noise — consulted doctors until they could find one that agreed with their suspicions. It was recommended that I be tested and educated right away so that I could cope best with my newfound disability and learn to speak. I was enrolled at a school for the deaf at age 2, going on 3. My parents were taking music lessons then and I got included along. My music teacher being frustrated with my ability to play the piano right phoned my parents advising that I get art lessons instead. This move came as a great relief on my part as I was playing only by sight as opposed to ear.

“Challenge after challenge followed through elementary and high school. After school, I persisted through my art classes and speech therapy in between. Tutors helped fill any void in my education throughout the years, and for this, I am grateful! I received scholarships toward a master’s degree, including a fellowship in my junior year. During this period, hyperrealism happened to be a strong trend in NYC. I readily took upon this explosively large-scale type of realism in my work for its mastery of colorful detail.

Having taught and mentored deaf youth over previous years, it has been my strong intent to memorialize the plight of our world’s children, granting them public awareness through my art.

“Up to the present time, I had wished to create a theme; a story expressed as a portrait series. I wanted minority children to be memorialized and this deaf-blind infant from Texas named Orion caught my attention via Facebook. Both his parents being deaf, gladly honored my request to seek through their family album for some frames of Orion. I have so far completed six portraits of Orion, who, not unlike me as a child, exhibited a disheveled crop of white hair, lanky limbs, and was often barefoot in shorts. The only difference was that I had eyes to see and had much greater opportunity to run and play without getting injured.

“Having taught and mentored deaf youth over previous years, it has been my strong intent to memorialize the plight of our world’s children, granting them public awareness through my art. As a society, there is much room for improvement and reform in protecting our children and their future. I hope my art will make inroads in inspiring others into action, toward a better world for newer generations to come.”

Interviewed by Jay Max

‘I work with people with autism and I think that’s helped me to identify with them and identify that if they’re having an issue, why it’s an issue.’

Levittown

“I have an auditory processing disorder. It was a challenge socially and academically and also because I couldn’t hear in my right ear, I’m deaf in that ear. It was very hard as a child to make friends. I didn’t know how to connect with people because I wasn’t able to talk to people in a group. It would become overwhelming very quickly. In college when I realized this was an issue, I started to find better ways to cope. I would sit in certain areas; I would make sure it was quieter.

“I’m still not comfortable with large groups of people because it becomes very overwhelming. I can’t have a one-on-one conversation with someone if it’s loud in a room. There’s this level of processing that doesn’t happen when there’s a lot of people in the room. I’m an over communicator. I want things to be clear on my end so I ask a lot of questions. It’s only because I want to understand the whole picture.

Why else are we on this earth if you’re not connecting with people? It appears harder in this season but it’s so powerful to remember a piece of somebody, that could be life changing.

“I work with people with autism and I think that’s helped me to identify with them and identify that if they’re having an issue, why it’s an issue. How can I better communicate with them? I really look for people’s strengths and pay attention to what they say. Because I don’t have the ability to hear like everyone else, it’s forced me to pay attention to what other people are saying. I really pay attention to what people say and it really matters to me. Especially, if you have someone with a disability, it can be trial and error to figure out what’s best for them. And that’s really fun for me. It’s not only that you’re getting to know the person, but you’re also finding out their strengths and weaknesses and helping them achieve their goals by really paying attention and delving into what works for them.

“Seeing people as who they are is extremely powerful and meaningful. When you actually see that person as who they are, it can be life changing to someone. Why else are we on this earth if you’re not connecting with people? It appears harder in this season but it’s so powerful to remember a piece of somebody, that could be life changing. And you only remember that if you listen.”

‘At first it didn’t occur to me that I was impacting lives. I wasn’t looking to be a mentor, but I was doing it without realizing it.’

Levittown

“I suddenly found myself trying to figure out how to teach. When I was 16, I gave drum lessons to third graders over the summer to prepare them for the fourth-grade band. I would teach my experience and exposure to things and say to the kids, ‘You tell me what you want to learn and I will teach it to you; in exchange, you have to be willing to learn what I want to teach you because you know what you want, and I know what you need.’ I wanted them to feel like young adults and that their opinion counted. Ever since then, I taught privately.

“My father used to drive me to local gigs with wedding bands, top 40 bands and bar bands. I chose not to go to college and work professionally. At 27, I got a call from my old chorus teacher, now the district’s director of music and fine arts, asking for help with the 27 drummers in the high school band. It was supposed to be for two months, and it turned into years of me being the percussion advisor. Five years later, I got another call from Long Island High School for the Arts (LIHSA). They were looking for a percussion teacher. I started at LIHSA for a few hours each week.

I may never be a millionaire, but I’m very blessed because I get to share my passion for performing and teaching.

“My connection to teaching got stronger and it became a lot of fun. When students said they loved my class, at first it didn’t occur to me that I was impacting lives. I wasn’t looking to be a mentor, but I was doing it without realizing it. The turning point for me was when a former student sent me a note: ‘I’m going to be an education major because one day I want to be somebody else’s Jerry.’ I had the wind taken from me.

“Now, I am the production coordinator at LIHSA. I stage and direct the performances and do a lot of behind-the-scenes work. Students tell me that when they were uncomfortable, I made them feel comfortable. The first time a kid is going to go on stage, I ask if they are nervous. They say, ‘Yeah,’ and I say, ‘If it makes you feel better, I’m not in the least bit nervous.’ They laugh and it breaks the tension. They never forget that. It’s so valuable.

“I wake up every day so grateful that I get to do what I love to do. I may never be a millionaire, but I’m very blessed because I get to share my passion for performing and teaching.”

Interviewed by Iris Wiener

‘If people need you to listen, you listen. If people need you to cry with them, you cry with them.’

Mineola

“I’m a third-generation preacher. I follow in the footsteps of my father and grandfather. I did church planting and parish work for years, but in 2010, I felt I needed to get back into chaplaincy, come out of the four walls of the church and re-connect to society. I connected with Northwell in Westchester and transferred here to South Shore University Hospital on Feb. 10, 2020, just before COVID-19 happened. I hadn’t even gotten a proper office yet when everything broke loose. We went from ordinary to ‘What in the world is going on?’

You began to see the rewards of being there; people began to feel supported. If we’re not alone, maybe we can make it.

“The fact that there were so many unknowns and death was coming so quickly was a big alarm. My spiritual adrenaline kicked in, so it was a matter of ‘Let’s get to work.’ At first, it was to support the staff because so many were afraid. I didn’t have time to be afraid. I had to be supportive, put on PPE and go. I’d walk down the hallway, and someone would say, ‘Reverend, I need a blessing,’ so I’d say ‘Bless you’ or pray for them. The entire hospital at one time was COVID. We had ICUs on four different floors. Seeing rows of people on life support and not being able to move was a jaw-dropping experience. You didn’t have time to stop and gaze. The needs were so dire and so imminent. Prayer and support became the apparatus of the day.

“You began to see the rewards of being there; people began to feel supported. If we’re not alone, maybe we can make it. We had 100-plus people showing up for prayer vigils. It encouraged people to pray together and draw strength from each other. We had people from Catholic, Hindu, Sikh, Muslim and Jewish faiths coming together. It was so tough for the patients being isolated. It was terrifying for them. They needed someone to come spend a few minutes, sometimes shed tears if they needed to.

“For the family, not being able to be there with their loved one, that tore them apart so much, the helplessness they felt. But we stayed together, and we came through it together. It’s about living out one’s faith in practical and effective terms. It’s being where people need you. If people need you to listen, you listen. If people need you to cry with them, you cry with them.”

Interviewed by Rachel O’Brien – Morano

‘Some days I just go with the flow and feel like my business can ride this out, and other days I feel like I experienced the devastation of what a house fire must feel like.’

Cold Spring Harbor

“I’m an artist and I have been designing one-of-a-kind jewelry since 2003. I transitioned to full-time almost six years ago after leaving the corporate world. I sell my work by participating in between 35 to 40 fine juried art shows and other events each year. My pieces are also carried in stores and galleries. As a small business owner, I don’t have set hours, but work from the moment that I get up until it’s time for bed.

“Unfortunately, COVID-19 has drastically affected my business. I’m one of many small business owners across the United States who are suffering because all art shows and similar events have been cancelled. Several of the stores where my pieces were once carried have closed. Galleries struggle to stay open, sales are dismal, and several show promoters that I have worked with for years have either taken early retirement or claimed bankruptcy. The entire structure of the remaining work force has changed. People aren’t getting dressed up for work, and formal events aren’t taking place. Many people have lost their jobs, and frivolous spending on items like artwork, specifically jewelry, are no longer options.

I’m trying to revitalize my business and myself, and my hope is that things will get better and that people will be interested in my work. That’s all any of us can really do, is hope for a brighter road ahead.

“Some days I just go with the flow and feel like my business can ride this out, and other days I feel like I experienced the devastation of what a house fire must feel like. Everything I have worked so hard for feels like it’s slipping away. I can’t control what is happening. I want to be able to work. I want to be able to engage with people, interact, explain my process, inspiration and creativity. It’s what I’m meant to do, and now all I can do is re-group and try to think of other ways to have some sort of visibility.

“I recently designed a brand-new website, have been more dedicated to my social media presence, and once the weather gets nicer, I plan on going back to the basics and pounding the pavement with brochures and business cards. I’m trying to revitalize my business and myself, and my hope is that things will get better and that people will be interested in my work. That’s all any of us can really do, is hope for a brighter road ahead.”

‘It’s been a goal for me to connect people because it’s a been a year where people felt so disconnected.’

Levittown

“I got into magic because I was terrible at sports as a kid. I remember playing with cards and coins and reading books about the history of magic. I was one of those kids who didn’t want to be fooled, I needed to know how it was done. It was a hobby that I parlayed into income. It really started developing when I transitioned into mentalism, which is my specialty. People are intrigued when I can get inside of their head and create some magical moments from some thoughts and random ideas and psychological experiments and that is what people were drawn to.

“Magic is sleight of hand and mentalism is more psychological experiments. Everyone loves a good card trick but feeling like you’re experiencing mind control or what seems like mind reading is a whole new experience for most people. It’s been over 15 years that I’ve been doing this, and I have been busier the last year doing Zoom shows than I was before the pandemic with live shows. It’s been a goal for me to connect people because it’s a been a year where people felt so disconnected. It’s great that people can connect, feed off of each other’s energy and enjoy this unique and entertaining setting. Seeing friends, family and coworkers clapping for each other has been the best. It’s actually enhanced my own appreciation in cherishing these connections.

It doesn’t make a difference if it’s for a Fortune 500 company or a small family, we just all want to do more than stare at each other through screens, we want to have a shared experience that we can talk about for months to come.

“There’s so much Zoom fatigue out there and this is the perfect way to get around that. I just booked in-person gigs right after I get my second vaccine shot. I expect Zoom shows to last just as much as in-person shows, as long as people are working remotely or families are not living near each other. They found this new way to connect in a safe and fun and affordable way that they never knew existed before. It doesn’t make a difference if it’s for a Fortune 500 company or a small family, we just all want to do more than stare at each other through screens, we want to have a shared experience that we can talk about for months to come.”