Faces of Long Island celebrates the uniqueness of everyday Long Islanders. In their own words, they tell us about their life experiences, challenges and triumphs. Newsday launched this social media journey into the human experience to shine a light on the diverse people of this wonderful place we call home.

‘As he got older, I just wanted to give him experiences. I’m not that mom who’s going to coddle him and say, “Oh, he can’t do that, he can’t see.”’

Levittown

“My son, Anthony, turns 20 in July and is totally blind due to a disorder called osteopetrosis. I thought I was having a perfect pregnancy, and he wasn’t diagnosed immediately after birth. A couple of months later, I noticed something was off. When I realized what was happening, I felt robbed. I felt like, ‘What did I do to deserve this? What did my kid do to deserve this?’

“I couldn’t look at pregnant women, I couldn’t go to a baby store, I had a hard time with it. He was born without osteoclasts, which break down bone to allow for new bone development while growing. Since he didn’t have that, his bones were growing on top of one another. Because of this, all the spaces in the body become solid. Bone marrow spaces where stem cells are made become closed off; it’s usually a fatal disease if untreated. Nasal passages and optic canals become small, pinching the optic nerve, which leaves a lot of these kids blind. Without a stem cell transplant, survival is unlikely. At 5 months old, he received a week of chemo to give the stem cells a fighting chance. Then it became a waiting game. He ended up having roughly 150 blood and platelet transfusions at 5-6 months old, after having a craniotomy at 4 months old. Seven days into the chemo, he was put on a ventilator, which was how he spent his first Christmas. It was awful.

“He came off the ventilator on New Year’s Eve and was doing well. He was discharged on Jan. 31, 2003, after three months in the hospital. He then went on round-the-clock meds, and I needed to care for his feeding tube. Life at home involved therapies, seeing lots of therapists, but he came off all his meds just before age 2. The next step was working on his feeding. He had a wonderful feeding therapist who worked with him for eight years; she was my Anne Sullivan, my miracle worker, who taught Anthony how to feel hungry. As he got older, I just wanted to give him experiences. I’m not that mom who’s going to coddle him and say, ‘Oh, he can’t do that, he can’t see.’ For me, I had to learn how to be the parent of a normal kid. The first few years of his life was about trying to keep him healthy, but then we just introduced him to normal things.”

When it happened, it hit me, he’s come so far; my kid is playing onstage. There was a time he was not expected to even be here.

“When they told me my son was blind, back when he was 3-4 months old, I said, ‘I’m not going to treat him like he’s disabled, and he’s going to experience everything he can.’ I started thinking of different ways how to do that, and I noticed he likes toys where you’d push a button and it’d make a noise, so I’d buy him those toys. I bought him bilingual toys, too, and he would master those toys. It was incredible. His sighted relatives couldn’t figure these toys out like he did, so from early on I knew music would be his thing.

“Today, he can speak several languages, and he started playing piano, for which he has a gift. He’s got perfect pitch and can play anything. He actually played onstage with singer Gavin DeGraw at The Paramount when he was about 11. At one point during the show, I told Anthony to come up to the stage and put your hand up, hoping Gavin would give him a high-five. He did, but when he tried to wave to Anthony, Gavin realized he couldn’t see, and came back. He started asking Anthony questions and was holding his hand, but when Gavin started to walk away, Anthony wouldn’t let go. Apparently, Anthony told Gavin he plays piano, so Gavin asked security to bring him onstage! I’m thinking, ‘Oh God, what is Anthony going to do up there?’ But once on the stage, he played a piece he played with the New York State School Music Association as a warm-up. The crowd started getting into it, and then Anthony started to play Gavin DeGraw’s ‘Not Over You,’ and the crowd went crazy! The band didn’t even get to that song yet, but they started playing it, and then Gavin starts singing it. It was such an incredible, unplanned experience. It was priceless. When it happened, it hit me — he’s come so far; my kid is playing onstage. There was a time he was not expected to even be here.”

I never thought I’d say any of this, but he is who he is today because he can’t see.

“The fact that he is graduating high school is a milestone for someone with osteopetrosis. Back when he was diagnosed in 2002, all I could find on the internet at that time was that this was a fatal diagnosis. Everybody always says, ‘Pat yourself on the back,’ but I don’t feel that way. Anthony always had a great disposition, and he has an excellent hands-on dad. I wanted to make sure that my son was a good and decent human being, but I feel like he just turned out that way. I don’t know if I can take credit for that. He’s just a happy kid all the time.

“Sometimes, I’m like, ‘Look how far we’ve come,’ because he changed my life too. He caused me to change my career path. I was working in the hair field and had a real fear of needles, but because of everything Anthony went through as a baby, I realized I had to buckle down and overcome that fear. I became a blood donor after seeing all of Anthony’s transfusions, so I could give back —and I’m a hospital phlebotomist now. He’s taught me so many things that I wouldn’t have known prior to having a child, let alone a child who can’t see.

“Looking back, upon hearing he was blind, I felt like that was more traumatizing than anything else, but in hindsight, I feel his vision impairment is actually his gift. When I started to see his strengths, it didn’t really bother me anymore that other kids could see and mine couldn’t. I got over that. I could have been that parent who said, ‘Oh, no, Anthony, you couldn’t do that, you’re blind,’ but I’m not. I never thought I’d say any of this, but he is who he is today because he can’t see. He has a whole different perspective of life than the average person. I’m not the ‘Face of Long Island,’ he’s the one who’s been through hell and back. He has persevered, not letting his vision impairment stop him. I’m just his mom.”

Interviewed by Ian J. Stark

‘My first time onstage was in front of 220 people. It was an instant high when I got my first laugh. I’ve been hooked ever since!’

West Babylon

“Being a chef and a stand-up comedian are similar because both food and jokes make people happy, and if you don’t deliver, the people will let you know it!

“I started out as a dishwasher when I was 15 and worked my way up to chef. For 18 years, I’ve been the chef at The Regency Assisted Living facility in Glen Cove. I like being a chef because I get to eat all day! I make cooking videos and give demonstrations. In June, I will be on the Food Network competing in ‘Supermarket Stakeout.’

“I got into stand-up comedy back in 2014. I thought it would help me with my public speaking, help me with my cooking videos. My first time onstage was in front of 220 people. It was an instant high when I got my first laugh. I’ve been hooked ever since!

In the kitchen and onstage, I’ve been very lucky!

“I’ve performed all over, including the Friars Club. I play Ralph Kramden in a ‘Honeymooners’ show every year. I’ve been on ‘America’s Funniest Home Videos’ four times. They liked my hyena laugh so much they bought it and used it with other videos.

“Movies? I was a mobster in ‘Me Familia 2’ and an extra in ‘Analyze That’ with Billy Crystal. But here’s my favorite story: I took a ride with my friend to Tribeca, where Robert De Niro’s office is. He heard that they were casting for the movie, ‘A Bronx Tale,’ which was De Niro’s directorial debut. So we get there, and my friend goes in, and they say casting is over. My friend says he’s not leaving, he’s waiting for De Niro.

“We wait an hour, my friend spots De Niro, asks him for a role. De Niro smiles, and then he spots me. He starts pointing at me. Suddenly, I say to him, in lines from ‘Taxi Driver’: ‘You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? You must be talkin’ to me because there ain’t nobody else around!’ He says, ‘You! Come to my office for an interview!’

“At the interview, I’m nervous like Ralph Kramden, and he says to me, ‘What’s the matter? You in shock?’ I said, ‘Yes, I’m in my favorite actor’s office for an interview,’ and he laughed. We talked a bit and he said, ‘You’re hired!’ De Niro, a great guy!

“In the kitchen and onstage, I’ve been very lucky!”

Interviewed by Saul Schachter

‘I learned that to be a great leader, you had to learn how to follow.’

Freeport

“I come from a first generation of immigrants, from Barbados and El Salvador, and grew up without a father. l was a young and dumb kid in my fifth year at a two-year school when joined the Army, then grew up and developed a fascination for wisdom.

“I realized I can learn something from every other person in this world if I just listen to the person speaking to me. I learned that to be a great leader, you had to learn how to follow.

“I became an all-Army MMA fighter, clocking in at 150 pounds, but I got hurt. Then I became a self-defense instructor, and through that work realized I have a special ability on how to teach anything to anyone because of the love I have for people.

“I was then deployed to Afghanistan as a 24-year-old sergeant who led teenagers into a war zone. I won a distinguished award for my leadership before getting out the Army and went on to get my master’s.

All of us, especially the ones who didn’t have positive role models growing up, would have saved so much time, energy and heartache if someone said the right thing to us when we were younger.

“I’ve come to the realization that there is a huge problem which I’m trying to find the solution for. The main thing right now is understanding that so many people want to do better, but there is no one around to help breathe life into new ways they can do things better.

“I’m just tired of watching the world burn, and I really want to be part of the solution instead of part of the problem right now.

“I really am trying just to help people in any way I can. I would have saved so much time, energy and heartache if someone had said the right thing to me when I was younger.

“Now that I have a 10-year-old son, if I’m gone tomorrow, I want there to be something for me to guide him. All of us, especially the ones who didn’t have positive role models growing up, would have saved so much time, energy and heartache if someone said the right thing to us when we were younger. Once I started hanging out with older folks, I learned so much from talking to them in a way that made sense.”

Interviewed by Ron Hart

‘I skated competitively for Levittown along with my brother from 1963 to 1969.’

Ridge

“As a kid, I would always compete against my brother, because he was older than I was. If he could go bowling, then I had to bowl. It didn’t matter if the ball was too heavy for me to lift, I didn’t care [laughs]. So, I found myself competing with him at an early age before we started skating together as a team…”

“We started roller-skating in Bay Shore in 1961. My mom would take my brother and I just to go down and skate a session. That was in the evening. Then on Saturday mornings, they would have these classes, and I asked my mom if I could take lessons.

“At the time, it was 50 cents for the class, and if you had to rent skates it was 10 cents. And that’s where I started. As I was taking the classes, one of the pros there asked my mom if my brother and I would consider taking dance lessons, and that’s how we began skating competitively.”

“We skated in Bay Shore for two years for two years, then we moved on to Levittown because the rink was so well known. We wound up moving to Levittown in the fall of ’63, and that’s where we skated until I was about 19.

“We competed in dance and pairs. The professionals who taught the Saturday morning classes that introduced many children to the skating world. Some of the skaters started at 3 years old and competed through their teens.

“Our pros were instrumental in providing us with the many necessities to compete in a sport, not just the technical parts, but the emotional ones. We learned to be gracious and help others reach their potential.

“We gained perseverance, tenacity and how to handle the pressures of competition. We traveled to many states to compete and many countries for those who were on world teams. Our pros were at all our competitions to help us and cheer us on. It was so much fun.

“We have so many friends from back then that, even though we live in different places, as soon as we talk to each other, it’s like old times all over again. We all grew up together as kids. We would practice on Friday nights from 5:30 to 7:30, and then afterwards we’d all go bowling or to a movie. Jahn’s Ice Cream Parlor was right next door, so we were in there a lot.

My parents never had to worry about who our friends were because they knew all our friends and knew all the parents from the rink.

“We’d go to the Empress Diner all the time. Then, when we were older, we’d go out dancing at Conway’s West. They used to have New Year’s Eve there.

“In the community, I’d meet so many people, like people I’d work with, who’d say to me how they lived in Levittown, and they all skated at the rink. They all loved it. Their parents would drop them off on a Friday night, and they didn’t have to worry about them. Community-wise, a lot of people went there and were able to let their children go on their own and know they were safe.

“We ended up with a lot of good friends, and a lot of great people around us. My parents never had to worry about who our friends were because they knew all our friends and knew all the parents from the rink. And even though I had friends in grammar school and high school, my group were the friends I made at the rink. My mom always used to say it was the best money she ever spent.”

Interviewed by Ron Hart

‘My grandmother and I were really close. I took care of her. She was my best friend.’

Coram

“So my father was actually a photographer, but it was something he did on the side. He had a regular job at Cornell University, but he had a darkroom where you developed photographs. I learned it in high school. I wasn’t really into it then. I was young. I didn’t really even know what the heck he was doing.

“My grandmother and I were really close. That was his mother. I took care of her. She was my best friend. I moved to Virginia, but she lived in New York. So, when she fell, I went and got her and brought her down to live with me. She lived with me for 367 days. I used to tell her when I was 14, ‘When you get too old to take care of yourself, I will take care of you.’ I would even pray at night and ask her to live to be a hundred years old. I just wanted her to live to be old enough so that my son knows who she is.

“My son is now 19, and if you talk about his great grandmother, he’ll get upset the same way I do. So, I am glad that they were able to form that relationship. Part of the reason was that I could take care of her. She was on hospice. She passed at my house.

“She was really into my art. And I was a writer at the time. I did more spoken word poetry and stuff like that. I also opened for a TEDx event in College Park, Maryland. My grandmother was always my biggest support.

“My father passed away in 2010. We were super close, me and my dad, but he didn’t have the opportunity to see me do much. I was a college student at the time, so I hadn’t done anything yet in my life for real.

“My grandmother loved all the stuff I wrote. She kept everything I wrote for her. I found it after she passed. I kept it and I still have things I’ve written for her.

“When I decided to make my company, Life’s Interpretation, it was the interpretation of things that happened in my life that other people experienced as well, like the death of your grandmother or teaching your son how to ride a bike. So, I said I want to form an organization or company that gives back to kids. I felt like my grandmother was my biggest supporter, so I wanted to support kids in that same way, help kids who didn’t feel like they had people with support.

The goal is eventually for me not to have to even pick up a camera.

“My mother wasn’t really into the art. I remember one time, she said, ‘I’ll believe it when you get a check from it.’ So, when I got a check from it, I called her and I was like, look, I got the check from it.’ It wasn’t that she wasn’t supportive. But seeing was believing for her. She passed last year.

“It was 2010 when I formed Life’s Interpretation, but it really didn’t take off until 2015. It was a music and film class. One of my friends was a DJ and he did the music piece while I did the film. We wanted to give kids an outlet, someplace where they felt supported. We had kids 12, 16, 19 years old. Some kids, I still keep in contact with them. They still ask for my help at like 25. So, we still have the relationship with those kids, and we supported the music, film, and we taught them how to be entrepreneurs.

“Kids say, ‘They taught us music, film, and how to just be better artists and better people.’ And that all comes from my grandmother. She wanted to be able to give back to the youth and other things just came from it.

“I want to give kids the outlet to be able to learn how to do all that stuff themselves, like creating your logo, your own YouTube page, uploading your video, creating flyers and graphic-design media, and now that’s even turned into special effects and 3D art. I have one student who knows how to do it. He’s in middle school now, but he learned it when he was in elementary school. It’s crazy. He has been in my film class three times, but he didn’t really like film per se.

“I see Life’s Interpretation expanding into a school or academy. My girlfriend and I are looking at a studio space, almost like a warehouse, and we want to set it up as a place where people can come in and film. We also want to hold workshops and classes for students. She’s an entertainment attorney, so she can even teach the law aspect of the industry. It won’t just be you coming in and filming. The goal is eventually for me not to have to even pick up a camera. Like a director does, you make sure everything is up and running the way it should. Hopefully, it’ll get to that level, but for now, I’m OK with being hands-on.”

Interviewed by Dan Offner

‘When I get calls, I never know what the situation is going to be, but you try to do what you can to save the animals.’

Glen Head

“I had just retired, and I was looking for something that I was passionate about that involved the environment and wildlife conservation. One morning, before my daughter backed up her car, she luckily noticed there were a few baby rabbits underneath it.

“I made many phone calls, primarily to vets. They’re not really experienced with wildlife. At the sixth call, I was told about Volunteers for Wildlife. They were happy to take in the rabbits and treat them. Coincidentally, they had applications for volunteer employment.

“I started working with them in animal care. Volunteers for Wildlife is a non-profit wildlife hospital on the grounds of Bailey Arboretum in Locust Valley. It’s not animal control.

With all of the bad things in the world today, people should know there’s also a lot of good.

“We focus on rescue, rehabilitation and, hopefully, releasing the animals. It’s the only wildlife hospital on Long Island. We take in over 2,000 wildlife patients each year! We’re totally dependent on donations. I appreciate meeting good Samaritans who are interested in helping wildlife because animals are dependent on the public when they’re in distress. People call us first, and we have to get to the animals quickly.

“The natural instinct for animals is to hide when they’re injured, so it’s not easy. We may do some exploring in the woods to find them, and then we have to get them to our hospital.

“I do the rescues, and then we have a dedicated bunch of experts that know how to treat them. When I get calls, I never know what the situation is going to be. Once there was an osprey on the roof of a mansion. It had skewered itself on a lightning rod, requiring a construction lift to get us 100 feet up to him.

“You see some pretty bad things, but you’re trying to do what you can to save the animals. I’ve also done many educational programs with resident injured animals that wouldn’t survive if they were released. We bring them to schools and public events. The connection between children and wildlife is magical.

“It’s very important that young people get exposed. I hope I can get more people involved. With all of the bad things in the world today, people should know there’s also a lot of good. It’s up to us to make sure we have habitats for animals and to keep them safe.”

Interviewed by Iris Wiener

‘My experiences in college helped me realize that I enjoy being passionate about work. I respect that in other people, too.’

Roosevelt

“When I was graduating from Holy Trinity High School, I was trying to think practically, so I thought I wanted to be a computer engineer. I had been told that engineering was a field in which the world had many jobs. I had very good grades, so I never doubted my ability and capacity to learn. I had a lot of faith that this was what my job would be, and everything seemed to line up for my future.

“Initially, I went to Manhattan College, where I was given a mentor whose profession was in cybersecurity. He told me that after college he couldn’t get a job in computer engineering and found that he liked cybersecurity. He roped me in with that, so I decided to transfer to the University at Albany, where they have a cybersecurity program. Then I had an epiphany in the second semester of my sophomore year. I realized I wasn’t liking that anymore, either. My grades were slipping. My adviser sent me to the school therapy system to help me with my depressive state. This helped me see that I had a class in my first semester that I loved, and when I no longer had it, the crash happened. I had only taken acting because I needed an elective! My grades were great that semester. I decided to change to a theater major. I’ve been having a better experience ever since!

My new philosophy is that if you are passionate about something, you will succeed in it.

“I think I’m an empathetic person, and I have an ability to understand people, which is important in acting. Theater allows me to experience that on a larger scale while giving me the opportunity to evoke emotion. You need to understand many characters. I find it fun and I think I have a natural talent for it. I’ve learned that I also enjoy working in technical areas of theater. It’s making me a handier individual, and now I appreciate organization and collaboration.

“My experiences in college helped me realize that I enjoy being passionate about work. I respect that in other people, too. My new philosophy is that if you are passionate about something, you will succeed in it. You’re the only person who is going to be waking up doing what you have chosen to pursue. When you make these big changes in your life, everyone else will have their opinions. Regardless of what they say, the only person that is in control in that moment is you.”

Interviewed by Iris Wiener

‘I created a project I called Make Mom Famous. I want her art to be seen.’

Rocky Point

“My mother, Ruth Nasca, passed away after a short illness in 2018 at 89. A prolific artist, she made art almost every day for over 70 years. Her work, which is figurative expressionism, has been seen in numerous solo and group exhibitions, where she won many prizes.

“Shortly before passing, being a practical person, she said that she didn’t know what I’d do with all her art and suggested I take it to the dump. Instead, we moved it into our basement.

“There’s probably between 2,000 and 3,000 pieces! Through some seemingly magical connections, we had a show of her art in a New York City gallery.

I realized if I didn’t do this, the future of the art would be that it would go to the dump.

“Mom hadn’t wanted a memorial service; the opening of the show felt like a tribute to her life and art. I then created a project I called Make Mom Famous. I want her art to be seen. It was her whole life’s expression and it’s really good.

“The intended result would be I’d sell one of her paintings to someone I didn’t know for a certain amount of money by a certain date. Seemingly magically that happened!

“I then created another project, Mom’s Art Is Moving! I’d move Mom’s art out into the world, and people would be moved by it and her unique self-expression.

“I’d need a website and to market the art. Being retired for eight years and not wanting to have another job, I procrastinated. I realized if I didn’t do this, the future of the art would be that it would go to the dump. The thought made me sad.

“Having been a business owner, I realized I needed to hire someone to help. I asked someone who loves my mother’s art to work for me as a marketing assistant, and she said yes.

“It’s been a year since I created R Nasca Art. We’ve sold some art and also moved some in giveaways. We post daily on social media. The fact that there are many people I don’t know who are seeing Mom’s art is what I call famous.

“I also write a blog called ‘Ruth’s Truths,’ where I tell interesting stories about Mom’s life and her art. I have fun doing this. It doesn’t take a lot of time, and it doesn’t feel like work.

“I love honoring my mother’s life and memory. It’s an interesting project, doing something worthwhile and connecting with people, so it’s a self-expression for me, too.”

Interviewed by Liza Burby

‘We never saw this coming. I’ve been very emotional because it’s been five years since my diagnosis. It’s incredible to have come so far.’

Plainview

“Five years ago, I went through a routine mammogram and sonogram appointment. The mammogram was normal, but the sonogram detected a tumor. A biopsy confirmed that it was stage 2 breast cancer, with it also being in some lymph nodes. I didn’t have a family history. I was in pretty good shape, and I took care of myself. It was shocking and devastating.

“It was a long process, and I had to have surgery and radiation. It was six weeks back and forth to Manhattan for radiation. I was always on the go, and I would frequently just have a protein bar with me. That’s how I got through a lot of my days. Once I was done with everything, I made the decision to put myself back into shape, both mentally and physically. I was 52 at the time. There are things that you can’t control, but there are things you can control, like what you put in your mouth and how you take care of your body. I went to a nutritionist, and she said protein bars are processed and filled with sugar. She didn’t believe in sweets and desserts. She would tell me to take a walk around the block after dinner to get rid of any dessert cravings.

“That didn’t work. I started lying in my food journal and I would complain to Scott, my husband, because I just wanted something sweet. He went about looking for recipes, and he came up with this protein ball. It was exactly what I needed. I was still recovering, so for him to do that for me really just helped me be able to continue on in my healing journey. I wanted to take better care of myself and eat cleaner, healthier and be stronger.

“Fast-forward, and we partnered up with that same nutritionist to sell Scott’s Protein Balls to her customers. We were still making them in our kitchen when we first started selling them to bagel stores. Recently, we began donating 1 percent of all of our sales to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation. Scott calls us accidental entrepreneurs because we didn’t have any experience with this. We never saw this coming. I’ve been very emotional because it’s been five years since my diagnosis. It’s incredible to have come so far. We were so low five years ago, and it’s amazing to be here where we are now and that we’re able to give back.”

When your partner is going through something like this, it’s a very helpless feeling.

“When your partner is going through something like this, it’s a very helpless feeling. I can’t take the pain away, and I can’t take the procedures away. I would have done all of that if I could, but I couldn’t do anything besides be there for her. She’s tough. We got the diagnosis the day before her birthday, just as we were leaving for the airport for our son’s graduation in Michigan the next day. All that hit at one time, and she managed to get through it and come out stronger at the end of the day.

“When she went to the nutritionist and was told she couldn’t have any more protein bars, I could’ve gone to the health food store and figured something else out, but I wanted it to be more personal. I wanted it to be meaningful. I knew I could finally do something to help. I was always commuting to work, and she was always on the go as well. I wanted to do something for her. I found a simple recipe, and I started adding some ingredients. I needed a certain number of calories and certain grams of sugar. I started playing with a spreadsheet and adding how much of every ingredient to put in, and that’s really how I ended up coming up with numbers that worked. After a bunch of trial and error, I perfected it.

“We started with a peanut butter cacao for ourselves, and then our friends were asking for them. Then, we had people asking for peanut butter substitutes and nut-free and so on. That’s why I like to say we’re accidental entrepreneurs. It was a lot of back-and-forth and late nights to come up with flavors that work. So much of what we eat is processed, and since all the sugar products hit the market, all these other diseases have just exploded. It just feels like the time to have a cleaner product – something not processed – is right now. Our ingredients are thrown in the bowl, mixed up, made into balls and frozen. That’s it. It doesn’t use any processed ingredients or artificial colors or preservatives. It’s so important to eat healthy, and I’m just happy I was able to help her in any way I could.”

‘It’s “The End” or “The Beginning,” depending on which way you’re coming.’

Montauk

“I always loved the lighthouse. I loved fishing underneath it as a kid, surfcasting there, fishing in front of it with my dad, working on boats underneath it back when the Coast Guard ran it. It was commissioned by George Washington in 1792. It’s the fourth-oldest active lighthouse in the country and the oldest in New York.

“It’s ‘The End’ or ‘The Beginning,’ depending on which way you’re coming. I’m originally from Dix Hills but started visiting Montauk with my family in 1967. My family fell in love with Montauk so much we put a boat here and then, in 1974, my parents built a summer home on Lake Montauk.

“During college, I started working on boats in the area and at the yacht club as a busboy on weekends while going to college. I then went into the corporate world but always had a foot in Montauk.

“In 1987, my first daughter got critically ill right after birth. I was an executive in the mining business at the time, and my then-wife worked for a law firm, but we resigned and moved to Montauk for six months to bring our daughter back to health.

“We ended up staying for good and opening some businesses. We bought a building on Montauk Harbor; we opened a market, a bank branch, two different real estate companies and a liquor store.

“Meanwhile, that same year, the Montauk Historical Society asked to lease the property [the lighthouse], and the Coast Guard agreed. It was a slow start, as Dick White – then chairman of the historical society’s Lighthouse Committee – used to say, ‘When we first opened up to the public, we had a cigar box and did $6 in business.’

“There wasn’t a need for a keeper when the Coast Guard was there, but the society turned the lighthouse into a museum, and with that comes all the maintenance and responsibility of the property, which meant the return of a keeper.

“There’s a lot of upkeep necessary; the only things the Coast Guard still maintains are the beacon and the fog signal. Everything else the society maintains and pays for but, as the owners, receives no tax dollars from any entity. It’s paid for through gate admission, events and the gift shop.

This is an old building, and there’s things to get used to and…we have a ghost.

“In 1996, the federal government transferred the property to the society, and I came on in the late ’90s. Due to my background, the Montauk Historical Society’s Lighthouse Committee chairman asked me to help navigate the finances, and as I have this long love for the lighthouse, I was all in. Today, I’m president of both the Montauk Historical Society and the Lighthouse Committee.

“Marge, the keeper before me, was here for 31 years until 2018. She was retiring from her regular job and wanted to move. I have two married daughters and I’m divorced, so I mentioned to the committee that if she ever left, ‘I want to go in there.’

“When she did leave, we needed someone with a full understanding of all the structure’s needs, and I put my hand up. It was a point in my life where it made sense. My first year we needed to gut-renovate the keeper’s quarters and bring it up to code.

“During that time, I lived in a trailer on the property, and then in the basement on an air mattress. It was a bit daunting. This is an old building, and there’s things to get used to and … we have a ghost. Her name is Abigail, the newlywed bride of a ship’s captain that shipwrecked here. She was the only survivor; she crawled up to the lighthouse and ever since waits for her captain to return.

“I get teased all the time, ‘Have you seen Abigail?’ Well, I’ve had a couple of things happen, and I’m a linear guy, but I’ve hid my head under the pillow a few times.

“When Marge was leaving, I asked her, ‘What do I need to know?’ First, she explained how when the wind blows in one way, the fireplaces make an “Oooo” sound, and when it comes from another, the windows scream as they are old and leaky.

“So, I said, ‘Got it. Anything else?’ She said, ‘Yes. Never go in the basement or the attic after dark.’ I said, ‘What does that mean?’ She said, ‘Abigail. I would never go in the basement or attic after dark because of Abigail.’

“So, my first night, before the quarter’s construction began, I was sleeping there on the air mattress, and there was a thunderstorm. I get a call around 10:30 p.m. from our historian, who says, ‘We forgot to shut the windows in the attic. We need you to go up and shut them.’”

I walk the property every day. I check the premises every day. I make sure everything is locked, everything is right.

“I still had never even been in the attic. I went up the stairs. It’s pitch dark. I get there, and something goes across my face. I started swinging my arms around, and then it stopped. I walked forward a little more, and it went around my face again, and I flung my arms, and sure enough a string wrapped around my hand. I pulled it and it was the string from a light bulb; that’s what was going across my face.

“That was my first night here! As for Abigail, I still won’t look at her painting in the museum when I walk by it. I’m still working in the banking and business world, on a flex schedule, but as the keeper, I do a lot more than just live here.

“I walk the property every day. I check the premises every day. I make sure everything is locked, everything is right. We always have contractors coming on-site, I have to make sure everything is buttoned up. We have had issues with people trespassing and alarms going off. If I go away, we have someone stay here to watch the place, someone who is fully understanding of all the utilities and systems. It’s not just a cool place to sleep.

“There are restoration projects going on and more for next year. We have events here like speakers, film showings, discussions with professors and global explorers, concerts — and I’m involved with all of it.

“We also have a full-time staff, but I’m the only person here around the clock. I’m also here in case, God forbid, something bad should happen during a storm or if there’s a fire. But I’m also an ambassador for the lighthouse, to take people on special tours and talk about what it’s like to live here, to discuss what it’s like during hurricanes, nor’easters and blizzards.

“Being keeper is not for the faint of heart: The wind, let’s say it’s blowing 30 mph in town, at the tower it’s blowing much harder because of the geography, and if you’re not careful when you walk outside, your legs can get taken out from under you, or the door of your car can get pulled off.”

I never take living here for granted. I feel blessed every time I walk up this driveway, every morning I watch the sunrise.

“I love living here; I love giving tours, especially now that the tower is open again after two years because of COVID. I never take living here for granted. I feel blessed every time I walk up this driveway, every morning I watch the sunrise. We will always need someone on property.

“Marge was here for years. I’m here now and, for who knows how long? There’s been keepers here since 1797, and I’m sure there’ll be keepers here for another 200 years.

“It’s not for everybody. It’s isolated, you’re here by yourself, and you have to get used to that part. But the beauty of living here is unmatched. It’s an honor to live here.

“In beautiful weather, I’ll be outside after the property closes. Lots of times, there are surfers nearby to watch. And I happen to be a triathlete, so I bike, I run. I’m always working on our budgets for all the society’s properties.

“There’s always plenty to do, so on a rainy day I focus on business or finances or other things, so there’s always something to keep me busy. But I’m never too busy to not want to take a walk outside and sit down with a glass of rosé or a cup of coffee in the morning and appreciate the beauty of this place and the great fortune that the historical society owns it!

“I like to note that the people of Montauk and the historical society, that together we are the trustees of this national landmark — and it’s a symbol of Long Island, too! It’s on license plates! And the society actually owns it. … It’s unbelievable.

“It’s all due to the hard work of an unbelievable committee that’s done this since 1987, the hard work of many people, a very tight group of volunteers. It’s important to note there were decades of work before me that made it so I could ever have raised my hand to do this. For the next keeper, this is a treasure for that someone who appreciates and understands the mission and all that goes with it.”

Interviewed by Ian J. Stark