‘Working as a companion caregiver was a very rewarding job and became my passion.’

Nicole Laborde, Coram

“I immigrated to America from Haiti when I was 15 years old. I arrived at the airport with a lot of hopes, visions and uncertainty of not knowing what life would bring. I didn’t have any family with me. I lived in a small apartment in Brooklyn and enrolled in high school in Prospect Heights. I had to figure out life and take care of myself. At times, I felt discouraged because it was a difficult time. As I was going to high school, I also had to go to night school to learn the language better and help me understand the classes that I was enrolled in. I had to work long hours to support myself. At around 16 or 17 years old, while still in high school, I started working part time as a caregiver. I always found the health care industry interesting.

“Working as a companion caregiver was a very rewarding job and became my passion. Some of the people I helped treated me like I was their family. I was making a difference in their lives. After I graduated from high school, I decided to pursue my career in health care. I enrolled in a practical nursing program, and then I continued to work several jobs while studying to become a registered nurse. From there, I became the CEO of a vocational school – Ideal School of Allied Health Care.

“While working as a registered nurse, I realized how short-staffed we were. There was a huge need for nurses. I decided to start a school that would train people to become health care providers. I wanted to help solve the shortage problem and aid people to be better trained to provide services not only in the hospital setting, but also in the nursing home setting, since that’s where I started. I researched and put in an immense amount of work and became licensed in July of 2013 to start a school and teach students.

“Our first class was in September of 2013. We had five home health aides and about five nursing assistants in a class. We started small, but we’ve now graduated well over 4,000 people in all areas from home health aide to medical assistant. From time to time, I will teach a class as well.”

At a very young age, I did imagine myself here. I didn’t know how I would carry out my visions and dreams, but I did.

“There is a lot of abuse, and lack of proper training and education, in the health care field. It’s important to teach our students more than just the medical side of health care. We teach them to be understanding towards patients and family members. I want each student to treat their patients with the same level of compassion, respect and dignity as they would a loved one. The lack of education isn’t just on health care professionals, but also family members looking for services for loved ones. Unfortunately, some family members may not do a thorough background check and they end up hiring someone who isn’t properly trained or certified.

“My long-term goal is to see students, especially immigrants like myself, come and get their education and then go out there to provide beneficial health care services to their communities. About 90-95 percent of our students are immigrants. Some of them are from Haiti, El Salvador and the Dominican Republic. I have people that are 30 to 40 to even 50 years old. They come to our school and want to do something meaningful.

“I’m really pushing for more students to become health care providers. We’re still in such a shortage. I have more people in need of care than I have workers and students. As people are aging and as we get better medicine, people are living longer. They tend to want to stay at home and not be in a nursing home or an assisted living facility anymore. They want to stay where they’re comfortable. This is why the need for having more home health care aides is so important.

“Becoming a caregiver is very meaningful. Unfortunately, they don’t get paid enough for what they do. I hope sometime in the near future that people can understand and appreciate this type of work. Hopefully, there will be a better understanding of the job and an emphasis on the importance of it, as well as providers receiving higher pay.

“I always imagined being here in the U.S. It’s a lot of immigrants’ dreams. At a very young age, I did imagine myself here. I didn’t know how I would carry out my visions and dreams, but I did. It was not easy doing it all on my own, but it made me really appreciate life.”

Interviewed by Shoshanna McCollum

‘I truly believe that each octopus is an individual with its own personality.’

Coram

“I’ve been interested in octopuses since I was a kid, but now as an adult, I not only have them, I rescue them. My current octopus is named Birdie, but she’s not my first. Before her, I had one named Damian, and along the way, I had a couple of other octopuses. I’m also a serious saltwater tank hobbyist. When I walk into a fish store where they know me, they might say they got an octopus by mistake and aren’t set up to take care of it or don’t want someone not able to care for it to just buy it, so I’ll take it. I’ve built a network of people, and when they see something, they text me, like, ‘Hey, I saw an octopus at this store…’ It’s crazy, but that’s how it works.

“When I rescue an octopus, first I have to make sure I have a place to put it as it has to be the only thing in its tank; it can’t be with any fish or other octopuses. Once home, I acclimate it to the water, and to make it comfortable, I put in rocks, sand and some live food, like crabs or snails, so they can still eat like they did before I came into the aquarium. In nature, they hunt; you can see them putting their arms underneath the rocks, into holes and crevices, constantly searching for food, but I get them on frozen food as fast as I can, as getting live food all the time can be a problem, especially in the winter. I get them acclimated to table shrimp, dead mussels and frozen clams to give them a healthy diet all year.

“I truly believe that each octopus is an individual with its own personality. It’s incredible how smart they are. When I walk into the room, Birdie sees me and moves to the top of the tank, knowing I’m going to feed her or give her something to do. When I put my hands in the tank, Birdie immediately comes over and crawls all over my hand and tries to figure out what’s going on or maybe try to pull my hand into her cave. If I’m away on a trip and someone else has to feed Birdie, she’ll squirt water at them, or sometimes she’ll throw the food back or refuse to eat. She definitely recognizes me versus somebody else. They are intelligent; I would go as far as to say as smart as a 2- or 3-year-old human.

‘They see it in a store, think it’s cool and impulsively buy it, and then two days later it’s dead because that just doesn’t work with octopuses.’

“I don’t make any money saving octopuses, definitely not. Everything involved, it’s out of my pocket. My wife also thinks it’s amazing. I mean, she’s not too keen on the money or the time part, but she’s definitely as amazed by octopuses as I am. My kids love it, too. My oldest daughter will stick her hand in the tank and try and play with Birdie, and she’s fascinated with how strong Birdie is.

“I really wouldn’t recommend getting an octopus as a pet, though, because they involve a lot of investment in terms of money, equipment, food, time, dedication; and on top, it takes a lot of experience to recognize the little signs that show an octopus is not doing well, stuff that there’s no test for. You have to be able to notice that on your own. Unfortunately, I hear a lot of stories about people not taking care of their octopus. They see it in a store, think it’s cool and impulsively buy it, and then two days later it’s dead because that just doesn’t work with octopuses.

“When I first got Birdie, I would spend 2 to 3 hours a day in front of the tank just doing things like drinking coffee, eating or any type of activity just so she could get used to my presence, and I still spend about an hour-90 minutes to play with her, feed her or see what she’s doing. I still love it. I’m still constantly learning from her, and I feel like the majority of what makes octopuses fascinating you can’t read about. Unless you truly interact, observe and deal with one on a daily basis, you’re not able to grasp what these creatures are.

“Before I had an octopus, I used to eat calamari, I used to go fishing, but now I’m a total advocate that you shouldn’t eat octopuses. It’s like eating something that has feelings and is able to understand what you’re doing. I mean, you wouldn’t get a dog, raise it, and a year later be like, ‘OK, now you’re dinner!’ They actually have the ability to perceive what’s going on. Birdie, I feel like she loves me. When I come home, my dogs are there wagging their tails, and Birdie is at the top of her tank waiting for me to walk over. She gets excited when I see her. It’s just amazing to be able to observe what she can do and what she’s capable of.”

Interviewed by Ian J. Stark

‘My grandmother and I were really close. I took care of her. She was my best friend.’

Coram

“So my father was actually a photographer, but it was something he did on the side. He had a regular job at Cornell University, but he had a darkroom where you developed photographs. I learned it in high school. I wasn’t really into it then. I was young. I didn’t really even know what the heck he was doing.

“My grandmother and I were really close. That was his mother. I took care of her. She was my best friend. I moved to Virginia, but she lived in New York. So, when she fell, I went and got her and brought her down to live with me. She lived with me for 367 days. I used to tell her when I was 14, ‘When you get too old to take care of yourself, I will take care of you.’ I would even pray at night and ask her to live to be a hundred years old. I just wanted her to live to be old enough so that my son knows who she is.

“My son is now 19, and if you talk about his great grandmother, he’ll get upset the same way I do. So, I am glad that they were able to form that relationship. Part of the reason was that I could take care of her. She was on hospice. She passed at my house.

“She was really into my art. And I was a writer at the time. I did more spoken word poetry and stuff like that. I also opened for a TEDx event in College Park, Maryland. My grandmother was always my biggest support.

“My father passed away in 2010. We were super close, me and my dad, but he didn’t have the opportunity to see me do much. I was a college student at the time, so I hadn’t done anything yet in my life for real.

“My grandmother loved all the stuff I wrote. She kept everything I wrote for her. I found it after she passed. I kept it and I still have things I’ve written for her.

“When I decided to make my company, Life’s Interpretation, it was the interpretation of things that happened in my life that other people experienced as well, like the death of your grandmother or teaching your son how to ride a bike. So, I said I want to form an organization or company that gives back to kids. I felt like my grandmother was my biggest supporter, so I wanted to support kids in that same way, help kids who didn’t feel like they had people with support.

The goal is eventually for me not to have to even pick up a camera.

“My mother wasn’t really into the art. I remember one time, she said, ‘I’ll believe it when you get a check from it.’ So, when I got a check from it, I called her and I was like, look, I got the check from it.’ It wasn’t that she wasn’t supportive. But seeing was believing for her. She passed last year.

“It was 2010 when I formed Life’s Interpretation, but it really didn’t take off until 2015. It was a music and film class. One of my friends was a DJ and he did the music piece while I did the film. We wanted to give kids an outlet, someplace where they felt supported. We had kids 12, 16, 19 years old. Some kids, I still keep in contact with them. They still ask for my help at like 25. So, we still have the relationship with those kids, and we supported the music, film, and we taught them how to be entrepreneurs.

“Kids say, ‘They taught us music, film, and how to just be better artists and better people.’ And that all comes from my grandmother. She wanted to be able to give back to the youth and other things just came from it.

“I want to give kids the outlet to be able to learn how to do all that stuff themselves, like creating your logo, your own YouTube page, uploading your video, creating flyers and graphic-design media, and now that’s even turned into special effects and 3D art. I have one student who knows how to do it. He’s in middle school now, but he learned it when he was in elementary school. It’s crazy. He has been in my film class three times, but he didn’t really like film per se.

“I see Life’s Interpretation expanding into a school or academy. My girlfriend and I are looking at a studio space, almost like a warehouse, and we want to set it up as a place where people can come in and film. We also want to hold workshops and classes for students. She’s an entertainment attorney, so she can even teach the law aspect of the industry. It won’t just be you coming in and filming. The goal is eventually for me not to have to even pick up a camera. Like a director does, you make sure everything is up and running the way it should. Hopefully, it’ll get to that level, but for now, I’m OK with being hands-on.”

Interviewed by Dan Offner

‘Life can change in the blink of an eye.’

Coram

“As a social worker, I’m trained to help other people. But as a person living with an extremely rare form of eye cancer, I’ve also found myself reaching out for help. It shows how life can change in the blink of an eye.

“A little over 20 years ago, when computer usage was becoming more frequent, I decided to visit the local Costco optometrist. I left the appointment in shock. She’d told me to see an ophthalmologist right away to rule out a tumor. A retina specialist subsequently diagnosed me with a nevus, or freckle, at the back of my left eye. I had laser surgery, followed up by monitoring every six months in case it became cancerous.

“In 2006, a routine exam revealed the freckle had grown. I was diagnosed with ocular melanoma, a deadly cancer diagnosed in only about 2,000 people per year in the U.S. The median age for this disease is 55; I was only 40. I had two complicated surgical procedures in which radiation seeds are placed over the tumor, which shrinks but never really disappears, so I’m still monitored every six months.

I’ve formed friendships like no others I’ve ever experienced, and also lost dear friends that have passed away.

“In over 40 percent of those diagnosed, it metastasizes within 10 years. Fifteen years later, I am still here, beating the odds. It helped that my doctor, who started the Eye Cancer Foundation and its online support group, connected me with someone who had been through the same diagnosis and treatment. I serve on the foundation’s board of directors; I’m involved with developing a tri-state area support network and have been on the patient steering committee for the Community United for Research and Education of Ocular Melanoma.

“Although there is no cure, there is a community that comes together online and in person via annual patient symposiums, 5Ks and luncheons. I’ve formed friendships like no others I’ve ever experienced, and also lost dear friends that have passed away. With ocular melanoma, I’ll have scanning and monitoring for the rest of my life; you’re never in the clear. I don’t know why I’m still here and others are not. I do know that I will never stop educating others, raising funds for research and urging everyone to get an annual comprehensive dilated eye exam by an ophthalmologist.”

‘Our daughter was diagnosed in January with an anaplastic ependymoma after two months of random vomiting, chronic headaches, losing weight, not eating, not drinking, sleeping for 22 hours a day.’

Coram

“I am a strong believer in educating and advocating about pediatric cancer, especially brain tumors, because it might save another child’s life. If this happened to my daughter, then there are other children out there that this may have happened to. Our daughter, Anisa, was diagnosed in January with an anaplastic ependymoma after two months of random vomiting, chronic headaches, losing weight, not eating, not drinking, sleeping for 22 hours a day. Her ophthalmologist said she had optic migraines. They diagnosed her with just astigmatism and said she needed glasses, which would cure the headaches. But that didn’t seem to be it.

“We brought her to the pediatrician, wondering if it was COVID. We had multiple COVID tests and blood work taken, and nothing came back positive. One evening, she was sitting on the couch with my husband, which was odd because she was sleeping so much during the week, and I walked into the house, and I looked at her. She was facing me, but her eyes were deviated completely to the left and would not go back centered.

“I picked her up and put her in our bed, and as soon as I laid her down, there was a bright blue vein bulging from her forehead. I screamed for my husband, and we rushed her to the emergency room. As soon as we went in, the first thing the doctor said was that he needs imaging of the brain. Oddly enough, the entire time she wasn’t feeling well and complaining of headaches, we asked her ophthalmologist and pediatrician if we could have imaging of her brain.

“It just seemed like something was not right in the brain. So, when the doctor in the emergency room that night said he needed imaging of the brain when we’ve been asking for it, it seemed a little off to us.

“He sent us for an MRI, and when we got back to the room, there was a swarm of doctors inside waiting for her. They started hooking her up to machines. He asked me to step out of the room, and I was like, ‘I can’t. My baby’s in here. She’s crying. What is going on?’ He looked at me and said, ‘I have to be as blunt as possible; your daughter has a large mass on her frontal lobe, and pediatric neurosurgery is coming down to take her into emergency surgery.’

They told us to kiss our baby and wait in the waiting room.

“Because of COVID regulations, only one parent was allowed in at the time. So, nobody is with my daughter except for all of these doctors poking and prying at her. I just remember getting very faint and screaming for my husband. One of the nurses ran out to get him, and as my husband was coming in, they were wheeling my daughter into another room.

“Then the NP for neurosurgery came in and handed us a stack of papers and told us to start signing. I said, ‘We need a minute to read them over.’ She replied, ‘You don’t have a minute. There are no options for you at this moment. Your daughter is slipping into a coma.’

“At that moment I just felt very sick. My husband started signing the papers because there was nothing we could do. We had to sign for any risks. They explained the procedure, and my daughter was alert and watched everything as it happened.

“She was 2 years old. From the moment she was born, I always believed in communicating with my child, but I didn’t get to do that at this moment, and she was very confused. I was confused. My husband was confused. There were a lot of emotions. They told us to kiss our baby and wait in the waiting room.

“The first surgery was to drain the fluid from her head. The second surgery was to drain the fluid from the cyst that was wrapped around her tumor. And then she had a third surgery to take the mass out. The neurosurgeon said he was just going to go in and take out the cyst that wrapped around the tumor because he didn’t want to touch the tumor yet. When he went in, he touched the cyst and the whole thing collapsed, and they were able to take the whole thing out in one shot with no remnants. Everything was out, and it only took about two to three hours for that surgery, which was great.

“When we brought her home a day before her birthday, her speech was a little off, but we worked with her, and her speech got back to normal in a week. We had to watch for cognitive delays, but we just kept working with her fine motor skills or gross motor skills.

The neurosurgery team at Stony Brook Hospital that took care of her is absolutely outstanding. Her surgeon is God’s gift.

“We had an in-home nurse come in once a week to make sure everything was OK. One morning, we got a call that the nurse tested positive for COVID. I went into my daughter’s bedroom to check on her, and she had a 102.4-degree fever, so I rushed her to the ER. They said she didn’t have COVID, but that she developed hydrocephalus and an infection in her body, which they couldn’t do anything to treat until they knew where it was coming from.

“The neurosurgery team at Stony Brook Hospital that took care of her is absolutely outstanding. Her surgeon is God’s gift. He did everything possible to figure out where this infection was. They put her on antibiotics and even tapped into some of the fluid where her incision was to make sure it wasn’t infected.

“I was on FaceTime with the neurosurgeon, who said, ‘I’m going to take a gamble and put a permanent shunt in and see what happens.’ They put it in and the infection went away the same day. Before we went home, we were told that the results of the tumor came back and that it was malignant. It was a Grade 3 anaplastic ependymoma, which is a very aggressive type of malignancy that only occurs in the brain and the spine. Based on her MRIs, there was nothing else that they could see and said to start radiation therapy and then chemotherapy.

“We did 33 sessions of proton beam radiation at the New York Proton Center. She did amazing, and her doctors there were outstanding. We started chemotherapy in April, and it was very intense.

“She did have an allergic reaction to one of the chemo drugs, but we stayed strong, and everything went well through the remainder of her treatment. Because of the chemo, she did have some poor kidney function, significant hearing loss, and she now has neuropathy for the rest of her life.

“We finished chemotherapy on June 24, and there is nothing in her MRI except for post-radiation changes. The cancer did not come back, and we are completely blessed. She is the spiciest little thing you’d ever see. The hospital tells me all the time, if we don’t see that spice, then we know something’s not right. She is part of a bowling league that meets every Saturday morning and a theater group that meets every Sunday.

We raised $144 for the Child Life Program at Stony Brook Hospital during the Farmingville Street Fair on Oct. 3, and we are collecting items through an Amazon Wish List.

“My husband and I were just going over doctor appointments for the week when I turned to him and said that we have to do something. We raised $350 creating wristbands for the Pediatric Brain Tumor Foundation, and then $3,300 for Alex’s Lemonade Stand in June.

“I was counting all the money we raised when I realized we should be giving back to local hospitals where we are being treated. I love raising funds for research, but shouldn’t we give back to Stony Brook, to the people who saved my baby’s life? My husband said, ‘I don’t know. Maybe we should start a nonprofit.’ Yes. We’re going to do that. I went on the computer and researched how to do it, and we now have Cadesca Strong Inc.

“We raised $144 for the Child Life Program at Stony Brook Hospital during the Farmingville Street Fair on Oct. 3, and we are collecting items through an Amazon Wish List.

“I have a large list of items that they need, which the community can donate. They need Lego kits. I know they gave a ton to my daughter. That can help a child strengthen their fine motor skills and put a smile on somebody else’s face.

“We both work full time. He works in a nursing home, and I work from home. It’s hard, but we’re doing our best. I think that we are getting to that point where everything’s looking up, and I want to be able to keep that energy and that positivity and make sure that I spread it to others as well.

“Anisa still has to eat her vegetables. She still has to clean her room and take a bath. We let her get away with little things, but we keep that normalcy.

“I want people to learn what and how important pediatric cancer is. I want to see the awareness continue and grow stronger for these families. Pediatric cancer is not something that’s ever going to leave, but if we know how to fund research to protect our children, keep them safe, and give them the right medications that aren’t going to hurt other parts of their bodies, then we are doing something.”

‘Branches of Long Island saved my life. It has fueled a fire in my soul that I never knew I needed.’

Coram

“I grew up with an abusive alcoholic father. I always felt like I didn’t belong in my family. I hit my teenage years without having a real father figure and that got me involved with a lot of wrong people. I had awful relationships; there was sexual assault and abuse.

“After I got married and was pregnant with my first son, I found out that my father wasn’t my biological father. I found out my biological father had passed when I was young, and his family wanted nothing to do with me. I had finally found a piece that was missing, but my heart broke all over again. I do suffer from PTSD, dealing with everything from my childhood.

“I started Branches Long Island in fall 2019. I was a part of community groups and mom groups and tried to help whoever I could, whenever I could, I collected on Facebook. And I said, ‘I want to start a nonprofit.’ My husband looked at me like I was crazy. We have four kids; we were both working. I put it out to my network, and within a few days, we had a name, and a few hundred people joining us.

I’m super excited about focusing on getting people help. My history fuels my passion, especially for these kids.

“We’re very grassroots. I was collecting items in my house and we eventually moved into my shed. Within six months, we opened our first outreach center in Middle Island, where we’re helping hundreds of families; we’re open seven days a week and we hired a staff.

“There are so many giving people and they just don’t know how to do it — this gives them an avenue. We’re opening a community center close to our current place and we’re hoping to focus on programs, education and the advocacy part of our group; for kids that don’t have anywhere to go after school, moms who need help budgeting, or nutrition, or applying for services. We help women flee domestic violence situations; we make sure the kids are set for back to school.

“I’m super excited about focusing on getting people help. My history fuels my passion, especially for these kids. A lot of them are in a cycle in the system, generation to generation. It just keeps getting passed down. I call them my twigs – I will take care of them because even if their parents are having a hard time, I want it to stop somewhere.

“Branches saved my life. It has fueled a fire in my soul that I never knew I needed.”

‘The tattoo apprenticeship helped bring me back to me.’

Coram

“Tattooing kind of saved me from a pretty dark time in my life. My mom was diagnosed with cancer and passed away 10 years ago as I was starting to get into it. She was the most excited out of anybody. She wanted me to design something for her and tattoo it on her. I sadly didn’t get a chance to, so I put it on myself on my left forearm. It’s a heart with a banner that says ‘Mom,’ an anchor for my grandfather who was in the Navy, the Yankees logo because she was a fan, four-leaf clovers for her Irish heritage and Pepe Le Pew.

“I’ve been tattooing for the last 10 years or so, beginning with an apprenticeship at Michael Angelo Ink, where I work now. I’ve been doing art my entire life, I went to school for art at SUNY Purchase, got a degree in fine arts, drawing and painting. I didn’t choose this career on purpose. It kind of happened by circumstance. I happened to buy a kit on Amazon. The equipment you get is not good at all. I was a client at Michael Angelo Ink before I was an employee and I decided to go the traditional route. I learned everything I know about tattooing and am definitely a better artist because of it.

I didn’t choose this career on purpose. It kind of happened by circumstance.

“I’ve always been interested in comic book art and that’s what really got me into art, especially as a kid. My parents and grandparents would buy comics for me. I was always drawing since I could pick up a pencil. I would emulate comic book art, now I do a lot of pop culture stuff; Disney, Star Wars and superheroes.

“After college I was like, ‘What do I do now? What kind of art profession can I get?’ I was working in an office doing data entry and then got the apprenticeship. Being a client and getting tattoos as often as I was, I became friends with my tattoo artist, and he said, ‘You should actually do this for a living.’ I don’t have an exact number of tattoos that I have, probably in the 30s, I’m pretty covered. It’s all stuff that I grew up with: comic books, video games and cartoons, all pop culture stuff.

“I have matching tattoos with my wife, so those are meaningful as well. The apprenticeship got me back into art and helped bring me back to me.”

Interviewed by Rachel O’Brien – Morano

‘I have a son now, my brother’s not going to be an uncle, he’s not going to see all these things that I’m doing.’

Coram

“About two-and-a-half years ago, my brother passed away very unexpectedly at age 34. I’m 34 now and next month I will surpass him. I will be living longer than he did and it’s an unimaginable place to be and it’s something I don’t see talked about a lot.

“I feel like I’m living in an alternate timeline where we got off track — this isn’t where we’re supposed to go, I’m not supposed to be older than you. I’m supposed to be following you, that’s how it was. In the beginning, you’re kind of in shock and there’s a lot of support around then. Then you continue to live your life and realize he’s not going to be here for this or that.

“I have a son now, my brother’s not going to be an uncle, he’s not going to see all these things that I’m doing. People two years later see you laughing, see you smiling and joking and they think ‘Oh, well she’s better I guess’ and I actually feel like it’s worse because there’s no more space to leave for these random days where I really miss my brother.

“My brother was someone everyone went to for advice, he always knew what to do, he was good at everything he did, he was smart, he could just excel at things. He died right before my birthday, so I knew from then on, that birthdays weren’t going to be the same for me ever again because I realized I’m going to be getting older and he’s not. And people will say ‘He would want you to do it, he would want you to be happy.’ It doesn’t matter what he would want.

I don’t need to be cheered up, I just need this feeling to go somewhere, to exist somewhere in the world.

“What I’m feeling needs to just exist somewhere, I don’t need to be cheered up, I just need this feeling to go somewhere, to exist somewhere in the world. The thing is, my son was born a year after my brother died and he was born on his due date and what was his due date? My birthday. I didn’t want him to be born on my birthday. But sometimes I wonder if there really is a place where we go and we see our loved ones and we can guide them or watch them after we pass away. I wonder if my brother being a problem solver, he was like, ‘Lisa’s son needs to be born on her birthday so that she could be happy about that day.’ Because I’m happy to celebrate him on that day and it’s a way to get through that day because it’s about him.”