‘Being stuck in a bed is awful, especially for a kid. These toys are what make them excited.’

North Babylon

“When I was 4 years old, I got really sick on Christmas Day and had to be rushed to the hospital. I stayed there overnight, and when I woke up in the morning, I received a big bag of toys at the end of my bed from the Child Life Program at Good Samaritan Hospital. I still remember to this day what I got. You never understand how much toys make a difference.

“The next year, I went up to my grandfather and said, ‘Papa, we need to bring some toys to the hospital.’ We got about 20 to 25 toys from family and friends, and we brought them to the hospital. As I started getting older, Emily’s Awesome Toy Drive started growing. We got approved for a 501(c)(3) nonprofit for The Emily Meyer Foundation, and here we are.

“Now it’s huge. I’ve donated over 17,000 over the life of the drive, and I’m happy to keep doing it. We don’t just do it during the holiday season. We do it all year round, which I do like because it gets some of the toys out and some of the hospitals do run out.

“After the holidays, there’s Easter, Passover and birthdays all year round, and you still want to keep the kids entertained. The main ages that we receive toys are about 5 to 12. So a lot of dolls, cars, crafts and stuff like that. I’ll get the donations to my house or pick up the toys, pack them into these big bags, load them in the car and then go to the hospitals, company or organization. Some people do like to donate money — which we’re very appreciative of — and that’ll go mainly to buying toys or bags to package my toys.

“It’s just really a great feeling knowing that I have the ability to do this because when you take a minute to think about it, being in the hospital kind of stinks.

“Being stuck in a bed is awful, especially for a kid. These toys are what make them excited. It helps their mood boost and feel better because it distracts them from the pain. Toys can even be seen as a reward after they get a treatment.

“So, when they’re able to receive something that I’ve donated, even if it’s just a puzzle or a coloring book, being able to give back and make these kids just a little bit happier, I know is something they look forward to so much. The fact that I help with that joy or happiness makes my heart warm.”

Interviewed by Victoria Bell

‘I was the only parent. I was the only one there to discipline my children and raise them. It was difficult, but I survived.’

North Babylon

“My husband passed away in 2016 tragically and unexpectedly. I’ve had to raise four kids on my own, and it’s been difficult. I have three boys and one girl, and they were all very young when it happened. I constantly thought, ‘What’s my next step?’ I was vulnerable, but I had to step up to the plate for my children. I had to get certain things done in order to survive and face whatever I had to face to get through life. At that time, I was a stay-at-home mom, and I couldn’t look for a job because of my busy schedule. By the time I took care of the kids in the morning, I’d come home and do chores, prepare dinner, do the laundry, go grocery shopping and do all these other things, and then it would already be time for them to come home. Then, when they got home, they had to go to these activities, like football and baseball.

Time heals our love and our grief, but there’s no time line on grieving.

“I was the only parent. I was the only one there to discipline my children and raise them. It was difficult, but I survived. I’m so close with my children. My role with them is as their mother and friend. I am their go-to person, and I want to always be that person for them. I had a lot of family support. On weekends, family would step in and offer support or babysit them while I took a break for myself. My friends were also a great help to me. Being able to get dressed up and get out of the house to see my friends for dinner about once a month was great for my mental health.

“I had my own support team, and my kids also had their own. The schools would check in with the kids and make sure they were OK. My kids were on sports teams, and the leagues were supportive and really stepped in by volunteering to drive them to and from practices. All the support was phenomenal. Three years ago, when the kids got a bit older, I decided that I needed to get out, and I looked for a part-time job. I’ve been working part time since then. It’s helped me to get out of the house, and it’s just beneficial to my mental health. My mental health could have drastically declined, but I always kept my head up for my children. I had to push forward. Time heals our love and our grief, but there’s no time line on grieving.”

Interviewed by Melanie Gulbas

‘I try to teach these kids the life lessons that football has to offer, and it’s tremendous being able to watch them grow up.’

North Babylon

“I always knew I wanted to be a father. And the two things I’m really good at in life are being a father and being a football coach. There’s no other game like football. Every player has a role. You learn so much: confidence, team-building skills, being able to see things before they happen. It’s an offensive and defensive game, so you need to work together to move forward. It’s something else!

“Once I got married and had my first son and he started going to school, he saw my passion for football. As a baby, he used to watch me play, not that he remembers. So, we started doing drills in the backyard, and once he was eligible to sign up, I asked him, ‘Do you want to play football? You don’t have to, but if you want to play, I would like to coach.’ And that’s when I was able to start giving back to the youth and the community.

Most adults forget, but I’ll never forget what it’s like to be a kid. To me, the kids are the most important part of this world. They are my heroes.

“We began with maybe 13 kids. Some quit in two weeks, and I started recruiting. It’s been about seven years now, and I’m still learning as a coach. I try to teach these kids the life lessons that football has to offer, and it’s tremendous being able to watch them grow up from when they’re 5, and now they’re 12 going on 13 and being looked at by other football teams. They’re talking about colleges and stuff. It’s cool, but I tell them just take it one day at a time. Keep going to practice, doing your homework and reading books. Things will happen later on.

“No matter where I am, I could see one of these kids from 400 feet away, and they’ll see me and come running up to me. It definitely makes me feel good and makes me feel like I’m doing something right. They’re not just football players, they become a family. They genuinely love each other because they spend so much time together. These kids are at practice five days a week, and then they have a game day. That’s six days a week that they’re together. And then when they’re not at football practice, they’re out there riding their bikes together.

“There’s no other sport that provides the intimacy that football does. Most adults forget, but I’ll never forget what it’s like to be a kid. To me, the kids are the most important part of this world. They are my heroes.”

Interviewed by Jay Max

‘Art has saved me from being helpless in the world and not being able to support myself.’

North Babylon

“I come from a family of artists. It was always in my blood. I won ‘most artistic’ in school and all that, but my real passion was music. I was an honor student, and my mom said, ‘I’ll support your music aspirations if you go to college.’ So, I got a degree in sociology and anthropology and had no intention of using it! I was naive about my future as a musician.

“Concurrently, and through most of my life, I suffered from cluster headaches. It’s one of the most excruciating pains you can have. And they would come once a year for three to six weeks, five to 10 times a day. The music fizzled out, and I needed to find a livelihood, and I didn’t know what I was going to do. I was unemployable because of the time that I would need to work around the condition. It’s impossible to do anything during these episodes.

“At the time I was a musician, I was also handling the business aspect of the band, and I got into marketing. I started a graphic design company, which is where I make my living. My first intent was to service musicians … but they never have any money. I had to shift the game plan to small- and medium-sized businesses.

Concurrently, and through most of my life, I suffered from cluster headaches. It’s one of the most excruciating pains you can have.

“So, art has saved me from being helpless in the world and not being able to support myself. It’s a blessing that I have an ability to excite people with the stuff that I can create. And I take it more seriously now than I ever have because my wife and I are blessed with an amazing kid, and whatever I can do to give him a good upbringing is my main motivation.

“Selling art on the side and doing creative design for companies have really put me in a position where I could do that. I’m not wealthy, but I pay my bills. To those who have a passion in life, especially if it’s a talent that you think you can utilize to make a living, don’t be afraid to compromise a little bit in the beginning.

“The more that you get yourself settled, the more freedom you’ll have to follow those pursuits. My ultimate goal is probably to move away completely from advertising design and into fine art. Art to me is an expression of your thoughts and feelings in a palatable way — but it only has to be palatable to yourself. Painting is my way of escaping.”

Interviewed by Jay Max

‘When you’re a child with Down syndrome, acceptance is everything. Just because you’re different, it doesn’t mean you don’t have the same goals in life.’

North Babylon

“It was quite a shock when I delivered. I knew right away something was different. We were unaware that Thomas would be born with Down syndrome. It was scary hearing that your first child is special needs. He was in school since 3 months of age with early intervention, with physical, occupational and speech therapists, plus teachers coming over nonstop. Now Thomas is 15, and his siblings are 14 and 13.

“Being a big brother definitely helped him. They’re always together, and they learn from each other. His siblings advocate for him and hold his hand along the way. I worry that he’ll be picked on because he’s different. It is hard for him to communicate because of his speech. I wonder if he gets teased and he can’t explain that to me. It seems that he is proud of himself when people look at him funny. I’ve never met somebody so confident, that will look back and say, ‘I’m me.’

“He’s also very funny and warm. Everybody that meets him loves him. He’s involved in community service. I love to see him out washing cars. He helped run a pet drive for the Babylon Animal Shelter. When you’re a child with Down syndrome, acceptance is everything. Just because you’re different, it doesn’t mean you don’t have the same goals in life. You want to do everything everybody else can do, but you just need to do it at your own pace. Thomas will do it, he has no limits.

“Recently, Thomas asked why he is different and why he has Down syndrome. I told him that he’s like a superhero, and being born with the extra chromosome makes him that much more special and he has to work that much harder. Now he thinks he’s Superman and that he’s super cool!

He’s also very funny and warm. Everybody that meets him loves him. He’s involved in community service.

“I’m so proud of him. Being a mom to Thomas is very challenging. Some days you want to cry, but you wouldn’t change it for the world. It makes you think, ‘This is what I was meant to do.’ I will make sure his whole life is the best it can possibly be. Maybe it’s meant to show me what kind of person I am. I’ve learned that I am smarter than I think. I don’t have that much confidence, but I know from dealing with him that I am doing everything right. There is no rule book. Now I know I’m capable, and I’m lucky to have him and he’s lucky to have me.”

‘I tried to get sober the first time when I was 27 years old. I actually turned 28 in the rehab I work at today.’

North Babylon

“I’m a substance abuse counselor. I’ve been doing this for 12 years. I’ve been clean from drugs and alcohol for over 13 years. The first time I remember using alcohol was just past my eighth birthday. My brother was having a Super Bowl party. He’s 14 years older. I would refill their drinks and start taking sips. It just progressed as I hit middle school. I never felt comfortable with myself, so I looked for something to make me feel better.

“Sixth-grade, I remember smoking pot. High school, I started getting mixed up with drugs. I tried to get sober the first time when I was 27 years old. I actually turned 28 in the rehab I work at today. I just didn’t fully grasp the whole lifestyle change that recovery involves. I didn’t realize that it wasn’t just removing the drugs and alcohol. The real problem is inside yourself. So, I relapsed again. I finally did long-term treatment, but I did it my way and failed miserably. I was desperate to find help. And then someone sat down, and they said in an aggressive way, ‘If your way worked, you wouldn’t be sitting where you are today. So shut up and listen to what we say, follow what we tell you to do, and you’ll stay clean.’ And that’s what I did.

Once I started giving back, that void I was trying to fill with drugs and alcohol, I started to fill by helping other people.

“Recovery’s about surrendering, following suggestions and listening. And as I started doing that, I realized that I had a lot more to offer people than I thought. I was always the person that brought the negativity to the party. I was always the person that did the bad things. Once I started giving back, that void I was trying to fill with drugs and alcohol, I started to fill by helping other people. I started to contribute to the good things in life. I find the same gratification when I help out kids with sports. I coach football and baseball. I like helping the kids and teaching them and seeing their faces when they’re first successful. And I get that same thing with my clients. I have people that call me years later and tell me that they’re still clean. They’re still sober and they have their kids and families back in their lives. And that’s probably the most rewarding part of it all — helping people the same way people helped me.”

‘I love that we’re able to bring communities together.’

North Babylon

“My mom is an immigrant from Colombia and my dad is an American, so I grew up in both cultures. But I didn’t always have a connection to culture. Being bicultural, I want to ensure my four kids had connection to culture. Through having conversations with other bicultural moms who are second or third generation Latinas raising American-born children, I saw they had some of the same concerns as me. We all want to make sure our kids’ cultural identity is nurtured.

“In 2014, I created Latina Moms Connect. We focus on social networking, facilitated dialogues and connecting communities to culture and tradition. For example, we’ll have Sofrito Sunday, a gathering of women and children at a member’s house, and we’ll make sofrito, a seasoning base in Latino cooking. We also have Bochinche Brunch, where moms discuss how they don’t feel connected to their communities. They mention being the only Latinos on the block and their worries for their kids in schools where they might be one of a handful of Latinos in classrooms.

At brunch, they’re in the park playing with other kids who have these things in common. They sense that connectedness because of a shared identity with one another.

“The kids don’t really identify because other kids don’t look like them, sound like them, etc. At brunch, they’re in the park playing with other kids who have these things in common. They sense that connectedness because of a shared identity with one another. We also have events and community celebrations, such as Parrandas Navideña with a Twist, a holiday caroling event in which we get musicians, visit a nursing home and travel throughout the communities singing Spanish holiday songs. We’ve put it together so families can introduce that kind of tradition to their kids, their communities and travel with us sharing it. We’ve also done events celebrating Three Kings Day, and we’re always found marching in the Hispanic Day and Puerto Rican Day parades.

“When COVID hit we did language interpretation at testing sites. Our members gave Latinos guidance on what to do once their test was complete, how to monitor themselves and we give out resources on how to stay safe. We also helped with food distribution. Our members came through. I love that we’re able to bring communities together. We have grown friendships throughout this group that I know will be everlasting.”

‘It was like you had something taken away from you. You’re losing something you had been so used to, and was yours, and it was taken away.’

North Babylon

“I was home when I got the phone call. My doctor said it was good news and bad news. I knew the bad news, but the doctor said the good news is we got it at an early stage, so you have multiple options on what kind of surgery you want and if I needed chemo or radiation. I always felt like something would come up. I always discussed with my husband if something came up, I would remove my breasts. They’ve done their job.

“When the decision came to be made, it wasn’t that hard for me. I opted for a double mastectomy and reconstructed with my own body fat. In the beginning when I was diagnosed, it was like what are my options, what are the next steps? I didn’t process it, I was going through the motions. I never asked, ‘Why me?’ It’s like you don’t have time to. You go through a grieving process.

I would do walks and hear of people who had metastatic breast cancer and won’t be cured, and you look at yourself and say, ‘I went through nothing compared to what the next person’s going through.’

“As much as us women are hard on ourselves on how we look, it was like you had something taken away from you. You’re losing something you had been so used to, and was yours, and it was taken away. Months later, it did hit. But I look back and see I was so fortunate to have the support of my community and family. I would do walks and hear of people who had metastatic breast cancer and won’t be cured, and you look at yourself and say, ‘I went through nothing compared to what the next person’s going through.’ You meet people one year at a function and go the next year and they’re not there because something happened. I feel God gives us trials and we have to move forward and have faith everything will work out at some point.

“Even with the diagnosis, I volunteered in the neighborhood and schools, even helping others with other kinds of cancers. The way I got through it, every day I would wake up and be grateful I had the chance to do something different. I wasn’t just concentrated on myself, but on others and that helped me get through the most trying times. You have to look for the good even in the worst times. There’s always something to be grateful for.”