‘It was like you had something taken away from you. You’re losing something you had been so used to, and was yours, and it was taken away.’

North Babylon

“I was home when I got the phone call. My doctor said it was good news and bad news. I knew the bad news, but the doctor said the good news is we got it at an early stage, so you have multiple options on what kind of surgery you want and if I needed chemo or radiation. I always felt like something would come up. I always discussed with my husband if something came up, I would remove my breasts. They’ve done their job.

“When the decision came to be made, it wasn’t that hard for me. I opted for a double mastectomy and reconstructed with my own body fat. In the beginning when I was diagnosed, it was like what are my options, what are the next steps? I didn’t process it, I was going through the motions. I never asked, ‘Why me?’ It’s like you don’t have time to. You go through a grieving process.

I would do walks and hear of people who had metastatic breast cancer and won’t be cured, and you look at yourself and say, ‘I went through nothing compared to what the next person’s going through.’

“As much as us women are hard on ourselves on how we look, it was like you had something taken away from you. You’re losing something you had been so used to, and was yours, and it was taken away. Months later, it did hit. But I look back and see I was so fortunate to have the support of my community and family. I would do walks and hear of people who had metastatic breast cancer and won’t be cured, and you look at yourself and say, ‘I went through nothing compared to what the next person’s going through.’ You meet people one year at a function and go the next year and they’re not there because something happened. I feel God gives us trials and we have to move forward and have faith everything will work out at some point.

“Even with the diagnosis, I volunteered in the neighborhood and schools, even helping others with other kinds of cancers. The way I got through it, every day I would wake up and be grateful I had the chance to do something different. I wasn’t just concentrated on myself, but on others and that helped me get through the most trying times. You have to look for the good even in the worst times. There’s always something to be grateful for.”